Here We Go Again!

As promised in our Christmas card, here is where we are planning on putting updates concerning our next adoption here.  So far there isn't a lot to update!  We are in the process of getting all the paperwork into our home study agency and after that is complete, we set the appointment for the home inspection.  Then we wait... and look... and spread the word that we are looking.

You may wonder what we are looking for.  We aren't all that picky when it comes to adopting.  We would love to help a expectant mother with an unplanned pregnancy who is looking to adopt out her child.  However, we would also be overjoyed with a toddler.  Our family is already racially diverse and we love the infinite varieties that God put in this world.  While nobody wishes for sick or disabled children,we have experience working with children with physical and/or mental disabilities and would open to a child of any ability level.

We would love to have you follow our journey, ask questions, and pray for us as we embark on this next adventure in family growth.  In the mean time, feel free to scroll through the old posts and see where our last family growth adventure took us.

Human Again

It has been just over 2 years since we started out embryo adoption journey.  Now, for the first time in two years, I can say 'I feel human!'      

Even something as simple as hormone birth control really messes with how I feel and respond to life.  Right from the beginning I was put on not 1 but 2 types of birth control at the same time to start preparing my body for the transfer.  It only grew from there with more hormone therapy, pregnancy, delivery/surgery, new born babies, and continuing to breast feed.  We knew going into this that it wasn't going to be easy, but that didn't make all the hormone crazies any less present.  Watch out world!  This momma is back and she is stronger than ever!!  Closets are now being cleaned, meals are being prepared, organization is happening, and I'm putting in my two cents about the garden this year too.  And now my goal is to become a smaller human again...chasing 2 crawling babies may help with that.

And now, a baby update.  They are acting more like little humans everyday.  They are both crawling and into everything.  They also love to stand.  No attempts at taking any steps yet but they can stand for several seconds without holding onto anything. Amos loves to eat, especially meat!  Irene is still more petite, but can hold her own with eating especially if it is crunchy and salty. They have 15.5 teeth between the two of them.  I'm pretty sure they are both saying "momma"...not sure if it is in reference to me or just a fun sound to make, but I'm totally going to claim it.  Amos is super ticklish and has the best giggle ever.  Irene...well look at her picture.  She pretty much looks like that most of the time, taking everything it and making you work for a laugh.  You know the wheels are turning behind those eyes.  I think we have hit a natural routine with both of them taking 2 naps and sleeping through the night as well.

We recently learned that Irene is anemic.  While it can be a concern and symptom of many things in an infant, it appears that she just has low iron.  This can be common in premature babies, so we are hoping it is something she will just grow out of.  Currently we are treating with supplements, which she takes like a champ, but it is something we will have to continue monitoring.  Monitoring means blood draws...probably several over the next year.  Please pray that her little body responds well to the supplements and the blood draws will be few.

Next month we will be having a big potluck shindig to celebrate the babies birthday.  We wanted to post the info here just in case someone reading this blog was missed in the other forms of invitation.  All are welcome, please see the details below.

New Questions

From the time we brought the twins home we have been asked lots of questions.  Babies seem to be an open invitation for strangers to ask questions.  Make it 2 babies and you better count on having at least 3 conversations with strangers in any public place.  Truthfully we don't mind and rarely are we in such a rush that it is inconvenient to answer these questions.  From the beginning we got some basics:

"Are they twins?" (Yes)

"Are they identical?"  (No, it is a boy and girl, they can't be)

As the twins have gotten older we seem to be getting a new batch of questions. 

"Are they adopted?"  (Short answer is yes)

"What nationality are they?"  (American)  "No, where are they from?" (Odessa's uterus)

"Did you go over to get them?"  (No, they are from Seattle/I birthed them/or a combination)

"How long have you had them?"  (Since before birth)

The last two always surprise us when the first question isn't asked first and there is only one parent  with them, as if mixed race babies couldn't be a possibility.

We have even gotten:

"Well that is barely even adoption then?"  (Well yes it is)

"Is that even possible?"  (Nope, we're just a figment of your imaginations woooowoooowooooo)

Sometimes these questions lead to great conversations.  Sometimes they look at us as if we are super strange, and they don't know what to say next.  Other times I think they are left confused and we wish we had a way of  continuing the conversation after they have had more time to process what we have just shared.

Remember God brings families together in all sorts of wonderful ways.  We would encourage you to always give grace to any family and don't be taken back by the answers you may receive.

We understand it is a lot to wrap you head around, and truthfully we do just give just a short answer out of convenience sometimes, but we will always give an answer with a smile because we will never quit sharing our story of how God blessed us.

It Has Been A Bit

Updating the blog hasn't been at the top of the list lately...life to the fullest has been!  With our older girls in different schools this year, activities, ministries, sickness, and teething we have barely had time to sit lately.

Today I have a few quite minutes with babies sleeping and big girls independently working so I though I would give a quick update on twins.

Amos - loves to eat peas, carrots, squash, apple sauce, prunes, pears, teething crackers - pretty much anything as long as he can stick his fingers in his mouth after each bite to suck it down.  Rolls around like a champ and is starting to stick his little bum in the air for a crawling position but has no idea what to do once he is there.  Is currently working on 4 teeth!  Enjoys his big sisters immensely and is so excited every time they walk in the room.

Irene - is almost sitting independently.  Has discovered the cats and loves being in the same room as them, though most of the time they ignore her existence.  Is OK with eating and definitely prefers the sweeter foods.  Beat her brother in the first tooth race and is working on 2 more.  Primary form of communication is blowing spitty raspberries sometimes with the assistance of her thumb in her mouth - or your finger, or your shoulder.

The past 7 months have flown by and I feel like we have settled into our new "normal" pretty well.  "Normal" now looks like a house that is a little messier, lots of laundry, meals that aren't always cooked from scratch, a yard that isn't neatly tended,  and showers are optional.  BUT if "normal" also looks like playing peek-a-boo to try and coax a giggle, snuggles after full tummies, seeing big girls read to babies, smiles of joy when an accomplishment is made, and snuggles in bed to meet the need of night time feedings.   Life with 4 kids is busy and blessed, but we wouldn't have it any other way. 

Reflections

Today is the one year anniversary of the amazing, scientific conception of our adopted embryos.  One year ago Amos and Irene "woke up" for the the first time in almost 4 years.  It has been an busy year filled with appointments, lack of sleep, doubling the number of children we had and huge blessings. 

First baby picture

In addition to the two lives God entrusted us to raise, there was a third sole who awoke a year ago which He decided to have come straight to its' eternal home.  We have not forgotten.  We have taken the time to count her life as worthy.  We have mourned her. We have named her Vivian Xing.  Her name (we have always felt she was a girl) means Life Star.  She is counted among the heavenly hosts and her story matters.  

More reflections can be made by visiting the September blog posts of last year. 

Currant blog posts are made with one handed typing serenaded by fussy baby noises.  It is easier to upload photos one handed then type, so you are invited to enjoy the remainder of this post in photographic reflection.

 

 

100 Days

Today marks a big milestone for Amos and Irene's genetic culture.  Today is their baek-il!  Which is their 100 day celebration (well actually 103 days at the time of getting this published, everything takes longer with babies).  In the past it wasn't uncommon for children to die in Korea before 100 days of age.  The first party a child would have been given was to celebrate that they had made it through their first 100 days in good health.  If you are interested in this tradition more can be read on it here.

On a personal level, we cannot believe how fast these 100 days have flown by.  Both babies are right on track developmentally - holding heads up, big smiles, longer stretches of sleep at night.  In the ever so trusty method of "hold your baby step on the scale, then put baby down and step on the scale again" Amos weighs 13lbs (7lbs over birth weight) and Irene is 9lbs (5lbs over birth weight)!  More scientific measurements to come later.  We are also now on the regular "well baby" check-up schedule of only seeing a Dr. once every 2 months!!! This is a huge milestone and the longest break we have had from doctors since April 2014.

Amos and Irene are pretty happy to be alive too!

We also wanted to share the answer to a question we have been asked many times.  What is the cost of doing an embryo adoption versus a traditional adoption?  Well the answer is somewhere in the middle - it isn't as cheap as an in state adoption from foster care but it isn't as expensive as an international adoption.  Our personal expenses were roughly $11,000 which covered the medical testing, medications, travel, and clinic fees.  It does not cover the cost of the embryos themselves - these ARE NOT for sale.  The family that originally created them pays for them to be stored and are in no way reimbursed for this expense.  Unlike traditional adoptions, there is no tax credit or assistance for this process.  We were blessed to have the initial expenses fully covered by the day we did our embryo transfer into Odessa's body.

But, hey, then we were pregnant!  Thus the usual medical costs of pregnancy started rolling in.  Luckily Jeff is blessed with a job that provides great health insurance.  Just to give a little perspective on our "cost" of a twin pregnancy and delivery here is what we know:  

1. All OB appointments and labs were paid in full (if they can keep mom healthy then hopefully it will be easier to deliver healthy babies, so they want to make prenatal care easy).
2. Specialist ultrasounds are expensive (about $1,200 each - we had 5) and luckily those were covered too.
3. For a cesarean birth, plus 1 healthy baby, plus a 1 baby/12 day stay in the NCIU the hospital will bill your insurance for $75,879.27 of which we paid $815.30.  

We look at it as Jeff getting an awesome raise this year!

Many thanks for continuing to follow our embryo adoption adventure.  We are mostly recovered to normal life - feel free to contact us if you want to meet our little ones.  Most likely it has been awhile and we want to see you too.

Update

I have written about 5 blog posts in my head this last month, but there has been no time to write!  So here is my best quick effort to update you on our babies being home, healthy, and happy.  WARNING this may be a little scattered.

First some cute pictures:

Photo credit to Kellie Parry

OK now that you made it this far, here are some of the nitty-gritty details.  We made it home on May 24, 12 days after babies were born.  The big girls were still at Odessa's moms house so we had a day to settle in.  After they made it home, school ended 2 days later and we had a crash course in being a family of 6.  Jeff was still able to take some time off of work and was able to be home most of the next 3 weeks.  We are now pretty settled in despite the babies not having much of a schedule.

Babies are now 7 weeks old and doing great.  They are each more than 2 pounds over birth weight and most nights able to go right back to sleep after most night feedings!   We are still up several times a night, but being able to go back down is key.  Odessa has healed VERY well from surgery and is up and active; most days able to prepare 2 out of 3 meals and keep up with big girls summer schedule.  Life is mostly eating around here - in order for babies to be gaining so well that means they have to eat...a lot.  Which means Odessa eats...a lot!  Hard to do all of this in our current heat wave, but we are doing well and investing in many frozen treats!  Good news, Odessa's feet have returned to normal sized, it took 5 weeks for swelling to go down.

We were able to meet 1 goal - our nursery was complete the day before the babies due date.  They happen to be almost 4 weeks old by then, but hey it is done! It is so nice to be able to find everything to take care of them quickly.  It turned out being a conglomeration of memory pieces and things we think are special.  Here is a peak at this special space:

We feel spoiled in this space, it is a luxury we didn't have
 with our first babies.

Final bit of exciting news...we are officially official!

We were told when we adopted our embryos that the final piece of the adoption was having the legal birth certificates in hand.  There was very little risk that the embryos could be claimed by the family who had them created, but the was a possibility that they could seek contact.  With these simple pieces of paper, Amos and Irene are officially Kershners.